At least I make this look good

So my boyfriend is nearing the end of a psych 101 course. Being a 101 class, it provides perfect, 1-dimensional explanations of psychological disorders to diagnose myself with. According to this class, I'm a raving lunatic. However, I think my most disturbing conclusion came today with a very quick, 5 minute phone call from my boyfriend after psych class.

Tonight, the professor spent the final 30 minutes of class talking about some of the more common neuroses and disorders. My boyfriend excitedly called me afterwards and told me he had discovered that I was a total narcissist. Apart from the conventional definition of a narcissist (my brother and I have made our vanity very clear), someone "suffering" from this condition has an overwhelming and unrelenting need to be coddled and reassured that they are indeed loved above all other things in this world. This need eventually becomes so suffocating that the person doing the coddling becomes exhausted and takes on the narcissist's mental issues as if they were their own. "You become physically exhausted just being around the person," my boyfriend recited. To which I replied, "you say that like it's a bad thing."

Because my boyfriend is an understanding guy, not one to throw stones in glass houses, he didn't judge me or express any real alarm at this discovery...which led me to the completely misguided conclusion that my psychological shit wasn't a problem that I should deal with before it worsens, but rather an enviable trait that sets me apart from all the mentally sound gals out there. It's charming that I will gently weep after a hard day at work and then ask my boyfriend "[sniffle] Am I special?" It's lovable that I decided early on in this post that I wanted to use the word "myriad" and haven't had a good spot for it yet, causing my anxiety to get higher and higher as the word count goes up. My being psychologically "complex" could be my thing--my je ne sais quoi. Some girls have infectious laughter, sparkling eyes--I have fleeting obsessive-compulsive symptoms that come and go with my menstrual cycle. Win.

Also, apparently people with excessive anxiety (this is the part where Max and I hold hands in solidarity) are startled by loud noises...like baby deer.

Myriad.

XOXOOOO Kate